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Sanctimommies

February 20, 2020 by Young Scholars Academy Leave a Comment

We all know the type. Perfect hair, perfect makeup, impeccable house, above average children who could do no wrong. She’s the perfect mom and has made all the right choices leading to this. Underneath? She’s a mess. She’s doing her best just like the rest of us, but chooses what to put forth as an indicator of how her life is going. And while so many of those moms convey these perfect lives on social media, they do a fair amount of judging right along with it. Sanctimommies. Mom-shaming.

Here’s the thing: social media traps so many of us into thinking we need to strive to be just like her when the fact is that we’re all going to do the very best with the information and tools we have. You know the stuff I’m talking about. Breastfeeding versus formula feeding, birthing, sleeping arrangements, discipline, the list goes on and on. All these “experts” who think they know what’s best for everyone.

Don’t get me wrong, I have my own preferences as a mom and I’m not shy about them. Some of those preferences shape who I am as a teacher. I do things a certain way with my own boys. But, my preferences simply CAN’T be the preferences for every mom and every child. And let’s be real, I’m not perfect and in most of my own social media posts you’ll see messy faces, toys all over, and some spectacularly wonky hair.

So what can be done when these perfect social media sanctimommies attack? First, remember that social media isn’t real life. Sure you can find a wealth of information, recipes you’ll never make and craft ideas you’ll never complete, but not all that information is helpful, correct, or inline with your situation. You can’t convince anyone who doesn’t want to learn anything new, so don’t stress it.

Second, know that absolutely no one can make you feel shame or guilt except yourself. If someone is telling you something about your parenting choices and you know that you made the right decision for you and your family with the information and tools you had, that’s all you need to know. You owe the internet trolls nothing.

Last, it’s not about what your life looks like to everyone else on the outside, but about how it feels to you and your children. I promise you I don’t look back at my childhood picture albums and focus on the stuff in the background. I look at the smiles and the experiences that were captured. That’s what matters.

Filed Under: Family Tips

4 Simple Steps to End Sibling Rivalry

January 10, 2020 by Young Scholars Academy Leave a Comment

For kids, expressing frustration often translates to misbehavior. What they can’t express verbally, they make up for in actions and erratic behavior.

Children seldom do well with sudden changes. Anything that shakes up their routine is a threat. And that includes younger siblings when they suddenly come along.

An older child who’s had all the attention to himself all his life may realize he no longer gets the same privileges as when he was still an only child. These sudden changes and lack of attention can unwittingly brew resentment toward their younger siblings.

If not addressed properly, that can end up in sibling rivalry. 

Although this may be a common occurrence in families with more than one child, sibling rivalry can put a lot of stress on the relationship of the members within the household.

Taking steps to prevent (if not completely eliminate) sibling rivalry can help keep harmony, not only among the kids but also to everyone in the family. Here are a few simple steps to get you started.

 

Drop the labels

Children placed in categories such as who’s the smart one, who is athletic, who is friendly, and who is shy, will develop tendencies to box themselves into that single category and not strive to do anything or be anything else.

Apart from that, competitions arise when labels are involved. So drop the labels whenever possible to help eliminate competition and sibling rivalry among your kids.

We understand how handy it is to drop the name of a sibling who has accomplished something to urge the other kids to the same. But comparisons are what’s keeping the family dynamics toxic so leave the labels out of your conversations when speaking about your children and let them thrive, each in their own ways, without judgement.

 

Teach conflict resolution

While timeouts may help diffuse a situation and allow children to reflect on their actions while facing a wall alone, role-plays are a more effective method for teaching your children ways to resolve conflict on their own.

This may include:

  • situations wherein they ask permission or respond appropriately when taking turns,
  • using “I feel” statements to express their emotions verbally instead of lashing out when frustrated,
  • finding ways to cope with their temper such as counting to ten, taking long deep breaths, or walking away to get themselves out of the situation that triggers it.

Routinely check up on your other kids

Children are always inclined to seek their parents’ attention. They’ll aim to get it through any means they can, even if they have to cause trouble for it.

Babies are sure to be in more need of your careful attention but when you have other kids around the house, be sure to check up on them from time-to-time to make sure that they don’t feel left out.

Try to involve them in caring for their little sibling by asking them to do simple things they feel their sibling would be grateful for. 

Also try to schedule some alone time with your older kids on a regular basis. Ask them what they want to do and let them call the shots for a limited time. This is where you will also commit to giving your undivided attention to them for that certain period. 

What’s great is that this keeps you in the loop of what they’re up to, helps maintain your parent-child relationship, and fills in for the moments you couldn’t be there for them when you are busy caring for your little one.

 

Let them work it out on their own

In the heat of the moment, there’s one thing a parent should keep in mind: try not to get involved in the squabble!

Children have a lot of petty fights. It’s pointless to jump in and try to fix these at all times. Giving attention to these little fights only tolerates the bad behavior, leaving you with endless explanations for what started which and who did what.

This isn’t good behavior and mustn’t be tolerated so don’t bother wasting your energy fixing these. So long as no one is in danger of getting physically injured, the best way to handle them is to move out of the room and let them work out the conflict on their own.

 

Looking for more parenting tips? Visit youngscholarsacademycolorado.com for more! And if you’re preparing for your child’s early education in the Colorado Springs area, Young Scholars Academy’s preschool programs create an engaging learning environment with fun activities and unique scenarios that create lasting memories for young kids. Our family takes care of your family with the best child care! Please feel free to call 719-419-8418 to schedule your tour of the classrooms or visit https://youngscholarsacademycolorado.com for more details.

Filed Under: Family Tips, Holidays

5 Benefits of Positive Reinforcement in Raising Children

December 20, 2019 by Young Scholars Academy Leave a Comment

It’s no secret that being a parent is one of the most difficult roles in the world, and if there’s one challenging aspect of parenting, it’s managing your child’s behavior. Behavior management is crucial because we want to raise kids who know how to act and behave appropriately, both at home and in social settings. So how do you manage your child’s behavior? Do you find yourself constantly yelling at your child to call out their misbehavior? Are you often losing your temper and feel like you’re already overwhelmed? If you want to see a change in your child’s behavior, you may want to reconsider your approach. This is where positive reinforcement comes in. 

Positive reinforcement is a parenting technique used to encourage obedience and inculcate desired behavior without the use of punishment, threat, abuse, shame, or humiliation. If you haven’t given positive reinforcement a try, here are some of the reasons why it’s time you should. 

Positive reinforcement provides long term benefits

While it’s important that children receive the right amount of discipline that doesn’t mean that discipline should involve punitive measures. If you want to encourage a better response from your little one, use positive reinforcement when asking them to perform certain tasks. Positive reinforcement can provide more long-term benefits because it positively impacts a child’s long term behavior. On the other hand, trying to change a child’s behavior by instilling anxiety or fear may result in negative feelings that they may carry as they grow up.

Positive reinforcement develops a child’s character

Young children who are encouraged to behave appropriately by means of positive reinforcement tend to show more positive results in terms of character development than children who are motivated out of fear of punishment. In fact, imposing discipline by using a positive approach even compels children to exceed expectations. Children who are motivated by fear of punishment on the other hand, only comply with minimum effort; they only do the bare minimum so that they can avoid being punished.

Under a system of positive reinforcement, children understand that their good behavior results in positive consequences such as rewards or even mere recognition. This teaches them the value of personal responsibility and self-discipline.

Positive reinforcement makes a child feel loved

Not all children understand the concept of discipline, and they don’t grasp why their parents try to make them behave in certain ways. This is the reason why, when children get punished or reprimanded, they mistake it as a sign that they are not loved, and that their parents simply just want to hurt them for misbehaving. That’s the last thing we as parents want to make our children feel.

Responding to your child’s behavior using a positive approach will make them feel that they are loved and cared for. 

Positive reinforcement helps develop a child’s self-esteem

Children who are confident and have healthy self-esteem are the ones who are more likely to find success later in life. By using positive reinforcement, we are making our children feel good about themselves; especially when they have done something right. Instead of feeling terrible and focusing on the things they did wrong, they will realize that they are inherently good and that they can even do better.  

Positive reinforcement also teaches children to feel good about their accomplishments and successes – no matter how small they are. Punishment on the other hand, instills in young children a feeling of shame and sense of inferiority, which aren’t helpful in contributing to their happy and healthy growth and development.

Positive reinforcement makes you feel good as a parent

Using punishment or harsh words when disciplining a child can make a parent feel guilty, but you won’t have to feel any guilt when you opt to use a positive approach when instilling discipline. You will see a change in your child’s behavior and attitude without making them feel bad or feeling bad yourself for using force or painful words.

It’s not always easy to find an approach or technique that will be both rewarding for children and parents alike. If you haven’t tried positive reinforcement yet, it’s about time that you do to see how it works wonders for you.

For more helpful parenting tips, or if you’re looking for a good quality preschool, please visit Young Scholars Academy. 

 

Filed Under: Family Tips

5 Ways to Make Studying Fun for Kids

November 22, 2019 by Young Scholars Academy Leave a Comment

Does studying come naturally to your child or does he or she need a little encouragement when it comes to academics? Studying may come easy to kids who love school, but not every child can is into it. Sitting around reading books and reviewing notes quietly for an extended period of time can get boring. If given the choice between studying and spending time on the internet, most children would be inclined to pick the latter any day. This is where it can be helpful to find creative ways and interesting activities to make study-time more appealing. Just like the saying “Out with the old, in with the new”, when it comes to matters of studying, breaking out of the old routine may give you the answers you need. Help your child look forward to studying by making it a fun activity that he or she will enjoy. One powerful trick parents and teachers use to encourage their children to study more is by mixing things up. Here are a few ways to get you started.

Get out of the routine

It can be difficult to combat a child’s fleeting attention span. One way to help sustain attention is to let your child get up and take a break every 15 to 20 minutes, depending on his or her attention span during tasks. Aside from letting them take care of their usual business of going to the toilet or drinking water, make study time more fun for kids by planning activities that they can engage in during those quick breaks. Singing action songs or dancing to get them out of their seats can help your kids relax and refocus for the next session.

Incorporate games during study time

Incorporating games during study time can take any form. Alternatively, this can also work the other way around by incorporating learning during play time. Encourage learning by letting your child play some digital-based interactive learning games on a phone or tablet in their free time. You may also consider bringing your kids outside. If they are playing with other kids, have them take turns by answering questions relevant to the topic they are studying. Trivia games can also be a fun way to test your child’s knowledge. Just be prepared with a reward if they do well! Reward systems can be quite effective when encouraging kids to study.

 

 

Illustrate important points with visuals

Visual aids can vastly improve a child’s learning experience because most children are wired to process information visually. They are more inclined to read when text is accompanied by a photo or picture, as it helps to give them context. Colors will also help to capture your child’s attention. There’s a reason why children’s toys are always colorful, as children tend to pay more attention to bold and bright colors.The more colorful visual aids you use, the more engaged in the lesson a child will be.

Another visual learning tool you can use is drawing. Drawing doesn’t have to be treated as a pastime. It can be helpful to illustrate some important points when studying, especially when it comes to concepts that are difficult for children to grasp. Take visual learning a step further and make studying fun for kids by asking them to draw what they understood from the lesson. You can test their comprehension this way, while keeping them busy with this fun activity.

Incorporate role-play into reading

Sitting silently while reading non-illustrated text can be boring for some kids. Most children who are not used to reading long texts may have difficulty staying on track as their attention can drift.Encourage your child to enjoy reading more by asking them to read the text out loud. Ask your child to them play around with his or her delivery, intonation and voice inflection. Have children pay attention to the rise and fall of their speech while reading instead of reading in monotone. Not only does this help keep your child focused on reading the text, but it also enhances their long-term speaking skills.

Have your child take practice tests

Tests and exams can cause a lot of stress and anxiety for kids. This can be because they haven’t studied and are cramming for the big day, or because they feel pressure to get a high score. Help your child avoid staying up all night cramming for the exam day by taking each lesson bit by bit. Help your child out by making study aids or practice tests to measure their understanding of the subject area. This can be an effective method to ease your child’s anxiety. It also provides a great opportunity to point out areas where your child needs improvement as he or she prepares for the real exam.

Studying may take a bit of getting used to and can be a challenge to incorporate into a child’s life. Being a supportive parent and involving your kids in fun activities during study time can be significantly helpful to inspire good study habits. Help your child gain a better taste for learning by using these 5 simple strategies.

Preparing for your child’s early education in the Colorado Springs area? Young Scholars Academy’s preschool programs create an engaging learning environment with fun activities and unique scenarios that create lasting memories for young kids. Our family takes care of your family with the best child care! Please feel free to call 719-522-9099 to schedule your tour of the classrooms or visit https://youngscholarsacademycolorado.com for more details.

Filed Under: Family Tips

Shopping for Siblings

November 19, 2019 by Young Scholars Academy Leave a Comment

The holidays are quickly approaching and I am very excited to begin our families holiday shopping. This year, my youngest who is in preschool, is at that age where he truly understands how holidays work. In a sense this will be his first Christmas where he can fully comprehend the act of giving gifts. As we have had a few birthdays recently, he understands the process of picking out a gift and giving it to that person. It is an exciting responsibility that he has really become interested in, especially when shopping for siblings. I feel like this is a great time to introduce him into the process of spending money on a budget to pick out gifts for his sister this Christmas.

kid carrying money
Establish a budget for shopping

The first thing we did was establish a budget. I felt that explaining to him the reasons why we CAN’T buy every pony and electronic gadget out there was important. I told him that we only have a certain amount that we would be spending and we have to stay at that amount. I pulled $25 out in cash and showed it to him. I explained it as we have $25 like 25 points. He understands the concept of how points work in a game, you could correlate it to something of another value your child would understand better as well. Points is just what worked for us. So, he had 25 points to spend and that is all.

Next, we talked about the act of giving gifts. I reminded him that when we are choosing gifts for others, its not about what WE want or how that item makes us feel. It is all about the other person. Will it excite them? Make them feel happy? Is it something that they will use and enjoy? I wanted to really get him to comprehend the act of giving, its hard for a preschooler to not want to buy toys for themselves when shopping for others. Explaining the ‘why’ behind giving really helped.

We then talked about how to spend the money at the store. I clarified that every toy or item is going to be a certain dollar amount or points, so we have to pay attention and keep track. He understood somewhat, and then we ventured to the store. At the store I showed him the numbers and reminded him we can only spend $25. He started to shop around for his sister, picking out different toys, and really trying to keep up with the math. We took our time and counted, I showed him different combinations of toys he could choose from. Overall, he really did enjoy trying to figure out what to buy his sister while staying in budget. There were also bouts of frustration in the middle of our shopping expedition. It was hard a few times when he wanted to choose 3 items that were more than our budget and one big item that was way over. But, by calmly reexplaining to him our budget and the purpose of the shopping trip, he soon was able to see past it. He was able to narrow down a few items that he really thought she would enjoy, and he successfully bought gifts for his sister!

The joy that he felt picking out his gifts may be greater than when she actually opens them. He really felt in control, proud, and successful through this entire process. I am so proud of him for being able to problem solve and really try his best staying on budget and picking out something his sister will love. Keeping it simple and finding a way for him to connect to understand the process of using money was key. I am glad he was able to pick something out for her all on his own, it will make giving it to her that much more meaningful. Fingers crossed he can keep it a surprise until Christmas!

-Ms. Whitney
Lead Pre-Kindergarten Teacher
Curriculum Coordinator

Filed Under: Family Tips, Holidays

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