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Teaching Kids Chores: 6 Tips to Get Your Child to do Chores

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We all know that house chores or chores of any kind  can be a bore for kids! Teaching kids about chores, or even getting them to do simple ones, can be challenging for parents. It takes a lot of effort, may lead to disagreements, and it may even involve bribery! If we don’t get them moving in order to get a couple of things done, we get agitated, which can lead to frustrating and unnecessary arguments.

The goal here is to help children understand why they have to do chores, and how it will benefit them as they get older. Here are seven tips for how you can get your child to do chores in your home.

Give kids a clear idea about the purpose of chores

When we ask our kids to do something, the first thing they often ask is “Why?” – which is why it’s so important for children to understand what we are asking them to do and also why. For example, you may ask your kids to make their beds and tidy up their rooms. Kids may want to know what they are getting in exchange, or how it’s going to benefit them. Explain how tidying up their rooms or making their beds will make the place a more pleasant area in which to hangout and play during the day. Giving them a sense of cause and effect will help kids be more accepting of your expectations, and positive the next time they are asked to do chores.

Create a fun schedule and to-do list for your kids

This technique is very effective because it is visual. Kids can see what they are supposed to do when they are supposed to do it. What makes it even more fun for them is the feeling of accomplishment that comes from completing each chore. You can print or cut out something like their favorite cartoon character to serve as an item checker to use whenever they have to check off a task. Make a list of daily chores that need to be completed during school days, and a separate one for weekends.

Do away with using chores as a form of punishment

Chores are already a drag in kids’ minds. This is made even worse if you use chores as a punishment in your home. This is not productive. Chores will be more fun and enjoyable when they are presented as something that will benefit them (and others). Therefore, never use chores as a form of punishment for misbehavior, or as a consequence if they failed to study for their quiz or if they didn’t finish their dinner.

Go big when it comes to a reward system

One huge motivation, especially for school-aged kids, is a reward system. They get excited and tend to be more inclined to get tasks done when they know they will be rewarded. However, rewards do not always have to be in the form of material things. A reward can be as simple as a treat from their favorite ice cream shop or an extended 30 minutes of play time.

Play the “Big Kid” card

A little change in a kid’s chores list from making their beds, to emptying the dishwasher, may make them wonder “Why?” again. That’s when you pull out the “Big Kid” card. In a way, they will feel like a grown-up by doing grown-up things. Establishing a routine can also be a great way to instill a sense of responsibility and accountability. For instance, if children forget or miss a chore like setting the dinner table, family dinner time will start a little late, and everybody will be hungry. They will begin to understand why these so-called chores are actually essential in  their day-to-day life.

Learning about chores is an important part of growing up. It helps with instilling a sense of responsibility and accountability in children from a young age. Completing chores also provides a form of training as kids get older and learn the skills needed in order to take care of themselves in the long run and become more independent.

For more tips on good and effective parenting, you can check out our website at https://youngscholarsacademycolorado.com/.

5 Ways to Give your Child Positive Attention

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Studies show that when children receive positive attention from adults, it can have a drastic impact on their behavior. Giving children positive attention sometimes requires that we as parents alter our perspective. When we give children positive attention, it means we focus more on the good, and try to ignore (at least at the moment) the bad. The idea is that for children, receiving attention from a parent can be very powerful. So essentially, rather than telling them what they are doing wrong, highlight what they are doing right. It’s not an easy shift, but like anything else, it will only take a matter of time until it becomes more natural. 

In practice, positive attention can be exhibited in many forms. It can be shown with the use of “power words” and affirmative gestures. It’s important for children to feel like they are on the right track and that their efforts are appreciated. Positive attention, in a larger context, mostly depends on how to implement it in a healthy way. Studies have also shown that when we are clear and specific with our words when giving positive attention, children understand more clearly what kinds of behaviors are expected and appropriate. 

On a smaller scale, positive attention really isn’t as complicated as it may sound. It’s simply breaking down one thing into smaller pieces, kind of like expounding and picking things apart,  but in a healthy way. Some experts refer to this as “labeled praises”. This approach actually makes it clear to your child exactly what it is you like about what they are doing. This type of praise provides a very specific, effective positive response.Here are a few helpful tips and reminders as you practice giving your child positive attention:

Avoid negative attention

Children thrive from receiving attention from adults. It is part of their nature. If they can’t get your attention by behaving appropriately, they will most likely try to get it by misbehaving. Try to do away with unpleasant words,or words that are discouraging. This part may be the most challenging because scolding a child is often what comes naturally initially. But in this case, see if you can ignore the negative behavior, and then provide positive attention when they stop. This is called active ignoring. By withdrawing your attention when children behave poorly, it sends a message that they need to stop what they are doing for them to be able to get the attention they are seeking.

Be spontaneous when giving positive attention

Children often crave attention as much as adults do. Who doesn’t, right? You know how some things are a lot sweeter and meaningful when they occur unexpectedly? Make it a habit to give out unsolicited affirmations, as this will have a great effect on your child’s mood. Try to put yourself in your child’s shoes. If you are shown appreciation by someone, your mood will usually be lifted.

Create a positive environment

When children grow up in a warm, nurturing environment, it promotes a holistic growth. The tone you set at home should be positive, as this is essential for a child’s drive to be his or her bestelf. Doing so inspires children and will usually bring out their best. Whether your child is at home or at school, a positive atmosphere is beneficial to his or her social-emotional well-being and disposition.

Acknowledge

With every little accomplishment, acknowledge. Your child’s little victories are yours too. Every step, no matter how big or small, must always count. From things that they do right, to the littlest of achievements, acknowledge. 

Create a stronger bond

It can be quite challenging as you try to transition to a new approach and break the habit of making unnecessary comments every time your child misbehaves. Keeping your cool may be difficult, but in the long run it is necessary. Just like any other habit, achieving this change can be achieved through constant application. Try choosing and writing down your choice of words ahead of time for moments when you find yourself caught in a tough situation. It is also helpful to allot at least 10-15 minutes a day when you can give your child your full, undivided attention. Create a list of fun activities together that you and your child can do each day. For example, you could play a card game. When you choose an activity, you can make it fun and nurturing at the same time. Other ideas include board games, arts and crafts, playing make-believe,  or dress-up. This will not only be helpful in creating a strong bond between you and your child, it will also remind you of your own childhood and help you stay young at heart. 

Giving children positive attention may seem hard to do at first, but  it can be as easy as counting  to three. Giving your child positive attention is all about speaking and using kind words. The goal of this approach is to create a healthy relationship between you and your child. 

It always pays to know more. For more helpful parenting tips, please visit us at Young Scholars Academy.

 

Baby Safety Prep!

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With September being baby safety month, I researched to figure out what the big “must haves” are. We even asked our staff what they absolutely loved and what they simply did not use. Now not even going to lie was totally that helicopter parent with my oldest, literally bought every safety thing out there. I’ll admit I went overboard. Like seriously why did I absolutely need a baby gate when she was only a week old. I researched all the lists even the hospital bag was over packed. Did Sam try to talk me out of it sure! But I had my handy research ready to show him. Ha. I totally did not need most of the items that we spent money on.

Looking back on the time with my oldest and youngest I’ve totally let go of a lot. The essentials have been kept, baby gates, outlet covers, cabinet locks but for the chemicals only. They are children after all and why not let them explore. They are going to climb and make messes and letting them fall is a must! How are they going to learn to pick themselves back up? Exploring is a huge part of learning and problem solving. Everly is so independent its crazy she will make every attempt to do something on her own and will totally get mad if you try to help.

Now I’m not saying to let have a free for all. Set boundaries and expectations. For instance, if you dump out all the toys just remember you will need to pick them up. Or if you want to play a game later, you must finish your chores first. Yes, my kids have chores its how we are teaching them responsibility and earn their allowance. The last thing I want is for them to grow up thinking everything is handed to them that simply is not how the world works. But again working with them and setting those boundaries helps a lot.

Ms. Brittani
Lead Preschool Teacher
Wellness Coordinator

What happened? Fours & five!

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One morning you wake up and wonder what happened to my child. They don’t want to give you a hug as much. They roll their eyes at you when you ask them to do something. All you hear is “I can do it. Don’t help me”, “I already know that”, and the dreaded” whatever”. It seems that your child is now a walking attitude and confrontational monster. Welcome to the ages of four and five. Don’t worry it is a natural transition. There is a reason for it. You just need a few pointers on how to get through this latest storm. The main thing to consider is that your child is going through a huge emotional and physical change. The biggest thing to remember is to supportive and consistent.

Physically your child, according to them are having all kinds of problems. Their ones might hurt (growth spurt), they lose their teeth (what is up with that?). Since their bodies are changing their balance will be off and they may seem a little awkward in their movements. You may want to stock up on band-aids. You will see changes in their face too. You can look at them and be surprised that they look older. A little thinned out. The checks aren’t as pinchable. The physical changes are the easy part. They are explainable. They are expected.

The hard part is the emotional changes they will be going through. Let’s start with friends. They will be best friends with a child one moment, then they hate them, then they are best friends again. The best thing for this situation is to go with the flow. Let them complain. Just be there for them. Remind them that they can as many friends as they want and that there will be disagreements that need to be worked out with their friends. The thing to remember is that they are seeking acceptance with their peers and don’t know how to go about it. Guide them through by teaching them to be kind and respectful. Teach them how to solve their differences with words and understanding. The next thing they are trying to navigate is independence. They are realizing that they are growing up. They need to have some autonomy and control. Find things that they can do on their own. Picking out their clothes and getting dressed by themselves is a good start. Let them share in some responsibility in the house by doing a few chores. There will be a lot of frustration with you and your child during this. They want to be able to do this that they have never done and expect themselves to be able to do them one the first try which as adults we know that isn’t always the case. Give them the opportunity to keep trying. Be patient. As they are building their skills of independence you may notice a bit of a negative attitude coming out. They may be a bit sassy, use a tone of voice you don’t appreciated and let’s face it word usage may not be what you would like. Being consistent in reminding them of expectation will be in order. Try to remember that they are uncertain about what they are feeling and doing right now. They are afraid of making mistakes, being left out. They are trying to figure out who they want to be and how to go about accomplishing it. They are learning so much and their perception of their world is changing.
PS. Find a friend to help you. Someone to talk to who understands because you are going to need some emotional support yourself

PSS. Think of all this as a trial run to teenage years when it all happens again. LOL.

Ms. Dotty
Lead Pre-Kindergarten Teacher
NAEYC Coordinator

Children and Solving Problems

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Watching your children in conflict is hard. It can cause you to feel anxiety and fear. No one wants to have their children deal with issues with arguing or frustration. Our first instinct is to jump in and take care of the situation. But is that always the best move? Part of growing up is learning how to work through arguments and frustrating situations. They can’t do that if we constantly fix it for them. Sometimes it is better to make sure the situation and the environment is safe and then let them figure it out on their own.

While playing with a yoga ball a couple children decided to throw it up at a basketball hoop on the playground. Guess what….it got stuck. Now they have a problem. They want the ball but can’t reach it. It is to big to go through the hoop. As a parent and a teacher, you may want to walk over and get it for them. But is it really necessary? As long as they are safe this could be a great learning experience. I’ll let you in with a hint. They figure it out all by themselves. They tried throwing balls at it to bounce it back out. Eventually with suggestions from other classmates they used a hockey stick to push it out from underneath. The heroic cries of success were heard everywhere. Many problem-solving skills, teamwork ideas and patience were learned in that moment.
What are your thoughts when you walk into a classroom and see two children arguing and see the teacher not intervening immediately? I’m sure that the first things to mind is why won’t they help. I can guarantee you the teacher is not ignoring the situation. They are watching intently, evaluating the situation. They are making sure they are safe and waiting to see if they are needed or not. In this scenario the children can learn so much. They learn about what words are best, what tone of voice is best. How to listen and how to be heard. They can learn about compromise and negotiation. A hint from adult supervision about using nice words, a quieter tone and suggestion about taking turns or being fair can help guide them through.

A child was playing with cars and building racetracks. Making different ramps to help the car go faster and farther. One of the cars rolled under the stacked cots. The child initially asked for help. “Can you get it for me?” The first thought is to retrieve the car for them. But happens if you first give the child a chance to figure it out on their own. In this instance the child put several of the tracks together, slide them under the cots and swatted the car out. This child just learned an awesome lesson about thinking for themselves, gained self-confidence and a realization that they can do difficult things.

You will be amazed at how innovated your children can be when it comes to solving problems. They are creative with ways to manipulate tools in their environment. They are quite ingenious in connecting problems and solutions. They are very capable to do it in a kind and safe manner. Being present to help them is important. Giving them a safe and emotionally secure time and place to learn these skills is very important so that they can handle these issues when they are all grown up and on their own. Children are smart. They are capable. They just need the freedom to do. Here’s a NAEYC reference for something we’re doing in our classrooms.

NAEYC Standards – 1C.1 – Teachers give children a chance to resolve their own conflicts without immediate teacher intervention.
1C.5 – When children are in conflict. Teachers help them think of alternative solutions.

Ms. Dotty
Lead Pre-Kindergarten Teacher
NAEYC Coordinator