A huge part of helping our children maneuver this world is helping them set reasonable boundaries. At a basic level, this means learning when to say “yes” and when to say “no.” Guiding your child to make positive decisions for their well being.

Learning boundaries, even at a young age, will help set up a roadway of respecting others. The more a child sees and feels how their personal boundaries are respected, the more likely they are to respect others. Empowering your child to make decisions for themselves, no matter how small, sets them up to advocate for themselves. Here are a few helpful hints to guide your child along this journey!

Carol Horton, a Texas family and adolescent psychologist, suggests one of the best ways to advocate personal boundaries is to model them for your children. Respecting your child’s personhood and offering choice are great examples to put into practice. For example, with my own son I never force him to hug a family member – including me.

As he is growing up and learning to express himself, I feel it is important for him to know that I respect his personal boundaries. I ask him, “can I have a hug/kiss?” and I respect his answer, no matter how bad I want a hug before he spends a weekend with grandpa!

Now, I know my son to be a cuddler, so rarely is his answer “no” but I do want him to know that he has the option to say so. A great option here, and for anything, is offering choice. Decision making develops a resourceful skill your child will need the rest of his life. If a hug or a kiss is denied, maybe offer a high five or blowing a kiss instead. This is a simple alternative where affirmation is still available but it also gives the child a say in how it is done.

The ability to choose creates a sense of control. When your child feels they have control in their lives, the more likely they are to respect the choice of others. Practice giving your child choice in even the simplest of activities, like choosing pajamas for the night or which cup to use at dinner. The more decision making is practiced, the more they get used to it and the more he recognizes the choice in others.

The main picture here is that your child’s body and feelings belong to them. Your child is their own person rather than a part of you. Have discussions as the opportunities arise about boundaries! Take those moments and help put them into play by modeling what is right and wrong!

~Ms. Caitlin H.
Wellness Coordinator

Picture it: it’s a lazy Sunday. You’re on your phone, your husband is over there on his phone, one kid is lying on your leg with the tablet, the other is playing a game on the computer. Netflix has been mindlessly on for two days straight, and the weekend’s almost done. What is wrong with this picture? Mindless screen time madness. There is an entire family sitting in the same room, having no interactions.

Admit it; we are all guilty of this scenario in one way or another.

Technology is a part of our lives, there is no denying that. You are raising your children in a technological age; they really know nothing else. As parents it is our job to guide them in a direction of balance. Balance between technology and real life. The two are very much interconnected, but there still has to be a balance. Living completely through the internet is no way to live, but living unplugged is not realistic.

This is a parenting peg that is newer to the board. So, of course there are going to be people telling you what is best for your child and if you are doing it wrong.

Push these ideas aside; sit down and have a conversation with your spouse. You can talk about how you want screen time to be incorporated into your family time. Talk about usage, mediums and even time when phones/tablets/computers are appropriate.

Once you have come to some sort of agreement have another sit down, but this time include the children. Let them know about dangers, appropriateness, and times they will be allowed to have screen time. You have the ability to let them feel like they are a part of this decision which can help in the long run. This will all be tailored in different ways depending on the age of your children.

This conversation can happen at a very young age because they are already exposed to media at a very young age. Let them know that your phone is or is not allowed to be touched, or which apps they are allowed to use. You have to set these boundaries to help guide media usage to be a positive experience for the both of you.

Remember to always be with your child during their screen times. This is your job as a parent to give them feedback on what is real and what is not. Give them quality media to interact with. This could mean finding games or apps appropriate for their age and developmental stage.

What the Experts are Saying

The American Academy of Pediatrics discourages media use, except for video-chatting, by children younger than 18 to 24 months. If you want to introduce digital media to children ages 18 to 24 months, make sure it’s high quality and avoid solo media use. For children ages 2 to 5, limit screen time to one hour a day of high-quality programming. As your child grows, a one-size-fits-all approach doesn’t work as well. You’ll need to decide how much media to let your child use each day and what types of media are appropriate.

Remember that you are the parent, and all of this is ultimately up to you and yours. Only you know what is best for your children. Take in the suggested information about media, and decide from there what will work for your family. Do not let others make you feel shamed about what you have chosen. By gathering, researching, and processing this information, you have already made yourself more educated on how to make this work for your children.

Ms. Brooke
Early Literacy Leader
Young Scholars Academy

“No dessert until you finish that first!”

As a mom you  always worry that your baby isn’t eating enough or don’t eat when they should.

My first experience with picky eaters was when I had to buy 3 different types of cereal for my son, 3! It does become hard and frustrating when your child simply refuses to eat yet don’t have the verbal skills just yet to tell you what they don’t want.

So how do you handle this?

The goal is not to get them to eat the broccoli today or tomorrow but to help them actually like the broccoli in the long run.  Some food may seems ” gross or nasty” with our kiddos at times because they are green. That’s where it gets hard. Processed foods are not the answer to everytime your child decides they don’t like it. This is a habit that can stay with them their whole lives.

Here are some easy tips:

• Start hiding vegetables in casseroles, spaghetti or their favorite foods! Pinterst has a lot of great info for scenarios such as these.
• Keep at it! Expose your child to one new food or food group at least 4 times a week. A child’s tastebuds change every 7 weeks, don’t be afraid to come back to something.
• Don’t let them fill up on milk. When giving your child this go-to, they rely on this and will refuse to eat. Save milk until the end of the meal or use separate from meal time.

Always be sure to consult with your child’s pediatrician when you have a picky eater. Like I mentioned earlier, eating habits kids develop before age 5 can follow them the rest of their lives.

Remember through this whole process that many parents have been through the same thing. Stand your ground and don’t give in; you’ll be helping your child in the long run!

Thank you for reading!

~Tenesha
Safety & Health Coordinator

Early Childhood Educator